tomorrow is my last official day of au pair work AND the weather suddenly went from -4 degrees fahrenheit (-20 celsius) to 37.5 degrees fahrenheit! it seriously feels like paradise; i don't think it has been above freezing for weeks now. and and and i can hear the snow & ice melting outside. haha, really, such an amazing feeling. also, it definitely helps that i will be out of here soon. my friend chris invited me to stay at his apartment for a little bit, so i'll be moving out of potsdam and INTO the city/berlin. living alone (in a basement) has been a bit rough, especially during the winter, so it will be refreshing to have a change of scenery.
i'll be traveling to the US soon... dc & california, so i can't wait to see everyone again. i'll be studying in germany, argentina & india this year, so i think the next chance i'll get to be home will be next december :(
leaving the au pair job is a huge relief, but definitely bittersweet... i will miss the kids for sure, but i'm so ready to move on in life. i've never felt so low, cold & alone. i pretty much just felt like a servant everyday for the past 8 months... but there were good moments throughout and other beautiful people that showed up (like the family that i dogsit for, who are actually my landlords too... or my friend chris who has always been there). i'm actually not too sad to leave berlin... i did finally get to know a really cool guy recently, but i've accepted that it won't work out because of me leaving... and there is no reason to push it/force it to work out. i'm down with just enjoying our time together before i leave, but apparently he can't handle that/is afraid he'll get too attached. it's alright tho because he's probably right. i'm sure i'll meet some cool people in freiburg... but i have to find a WG (shared flat) first! i've contacted about 15-20 people so far, and have only really heard back from one.
i also recently purchased some deepak chopra audiobooks and it has brought a lot of peace, calmness & optimism into my life. i hope it sticks around :) i'll try starting yoga once i start school, and i really wish i could go vegan, or at least try it out, but the last time i did that, i caved in after 2 days and ate a large cheese pizza... it was just too difficult (mentally). haha
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